- Tao: Shit happens.
- Buddhism: The shit that happens is good.
- Hinduism: The shit that happens has always happened.
- Zen: What is the sound of shit happening?
- Jew: Why does the shit happen to me?
- Catholic: The shit happens because you deserve it.
- Protestant: Why doesn't the shit happen to someone else?
- Agnostic: Not sure there is such a thing as shit.
- Atheist: I don't believe in all that shit.
- Rasta: Let's smoke the shit !
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